Friday, November 11, 2011

help me with changes

i have always liked change. but not all forms. i like big changes, but in the day to day, i am realizing that i like predictability. and maybe that is where i struggle with being a mom. or maybe all moms struggle this way. i dont know. i mean, babies are constantly changing and i cannot always figure out how to deal with that. when matthew was 2-3 months old he was sleeping all night long. then he was up 3-4 times a night from 4-7 months. now he sleeps straight through, but a few nights where he is wide awake in the middle of the night just wanting to be held while looking at shadows.

then he goes through a month where he is constantly hungry and could eat an adult size cereal bowl of food, to days where he could go 4-5 hours without food and hardly down a baby food jar for dinner. in the past month all i had to do was lay him in his crib at nap time and he would be sleeping in 15 minutes, while in the last few days he fights me the entire morning, refusing to close his eyes, yawn after yawn, screaming in the crib, screaming in my arms. and now it is 11 am, he is finally sleeping, and i feel like i am ready for bed.

i really dont know how to handle these changes. i have matthew on a predictable schedule, but his body is constantly changing, growing, learning new things, processing new things, he is an individual, not a robot. kids, they have bad days like us. days where they are "off" but just cannot rest easy. i know this, but i just don't know how to accept these changes. i like to know what to do next and what will happen. but with these changes, i dont always keep my cool and act like the mature adult, but what parent does all the time?  i just am not as adaptable in the day to day like i thought. how do you, parents, handle these unpredictable changes in the day to day? please share. i work really really hard at it, but i need some good advice.

big new change over here. 
matthew is starting to eat with his fingers. 
we started with a few crackers.cutest thing ever.

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